After I, Rick, traveled over 24 hours, from Europe to Asia, I arrived at my hostel in Johor Bahru, Malaysia. Tired I was, but nonetheless, in the evening, around 7pm I met with Francesco and Isa. We spent a beautiful evening together. What a great start to explore Asia!
I met Francesco and Isa, who traveled together and met each other in 2016 in South America. They met again on their trip for 3 weeks in Southeast Asia (Thailand, Malaysia, Singapore). In this blogpost I share the story of Francesco, since he offered the main story and theme of the night. Despite that, also you, Isa, I wish you all the best and it was a pleasure spending time with you. The three of us had an unforgettable delicious meal in Johor Bahru. Viel Glück im Zukunft and who knows where also your heart will take you.
I checked in at the hostel in the afternoon already and was just hanging out and relaxing. A couple of hours after me Francesco and Isa checked in and while I sat in the common area, Francesco entered the space and I greeted him, saying “Bon soir”, assuming he was French, based on his soft English accent, which I heard him speaking before at the reception. I was wrong, he was Italian, as his name also revealed once we introduced us to each other.
He joined me at my table and we both sit and had a little chitchat. During the usual traveler’s introduction (who are you, where you from, where you going) Francesco mentioned he was a bit fed up. Tired of traveling. He is going to the Philippines next, but after 10 years of traveling, not worrying about money, not worrying about location, staying in different monasteries, practising wisdoms of life, he said to be a little tired. The endless freedom was not providing him that much happiness anymore.
Hearing what Francesco said was very interesting, since I, myself, do still feed a desire to travel and explore more places on this globe. I am not yet satisfied and fulfilled. Therefore I asked Francesco “What are you missing?”.
After a deep breath, Francesco said he will tell me everything. From that moment he told me about how he met the love of his life, how he has never felt before what he felt with this Brazilian lady. How he have had various girlfriends in his life, but never felt like this. How deeply connected they were from the moment they met, and even before they started talking. A perfect love story of how two souls met and declared each other their love. Such a deep, intense love, that it was instantly the right time and moment try to get a baby (Francesco is 41y old, so I assume he also felt a certain pressure and shrinking opportunities). And how Francesco mentioned “tricking nature and avoiding death”, which I assume is related to passing on your life -bloodline- through getting a child. He would do anything for her and give her all his love, anytime, anywhere. He also said, how they traveled and just stopped in the middle of the road and she would tell him how much she loves him. Sounds like something mutual, just wow!
What a story, and what a privilege to have Francesco opening his heart and sharing his story with me. That he did feel comfortable enough to do so, that I was able to give him the trust and/or space to do so. 🙏
(Un)fortunately, the story hasn’t ended here.
The Brazilian lady left Asia. After (what turned out to be) 3 intense weeks she returned back home and cut communication. (I almost couldn’t believe that this all happened in such a short timespan.) She doesn’t reply anymore to Francesco and the last thing she said was “My Love, My Life”. Leaving him confused, in the unknown and held by a string of infinite love, creating intense pain, not knowing where this will go. This all happened in the timespan of the last 2 months.
Francesco carries a lot of wisdom from all his travels and his personal and spiritual explorations. The (lack of) love is killing him and we both discussed how to proceed, since Francesco wanted to hear my opinion on the case, seeing how I resonated with both him and her. What I felt is that, so far it is mostly Francesco who has persuaded the Brazilian lady. Therefore we discussed to take a step back and wait it out, for her to reply, especially since is about to receive some flowers and a poem in the next days. If she wants, she knows through which social media networks to reach out.
Also an other female traveler (Italian couple) who Francesco met in the weeks before, said that Francesco seemed a little ‘aggressive’. A painful and confronting thing for Francesco to hear, since he is following his heart.
We acknowledge that Francesco also needs to move on with his life and not endlessly wait for unanswered love, so we discussed to send her only one more message. Which must ask for a clear reply from the lady and include a clear deadline, that in case she decides to ignore this last attempt, that also Francesco has a deadline to move on after. The story is to be continued, but not sure I will get to hear the outcome in the next weeks.
Life lessons?
This is such a life story, contained into just 2 months time. Various questions arise, so what is the lesson that life is trying to teach Francesco her? Was he too blindly in love and in the clouds? Why did this happen to him? What is it that Francesco is pursuing? Is it love? Is it safety? A home? Passing on his life, continuing his legacy, through a baby?
And Francesco told me he feels like a person of the world. He can live everywhere and doesn’t feel that one particular place is his home. That’s where I said a contradicting phrase: “Never forget where you are from”, to refer to your family, friends, where you grow up. In the last weeks I, personally, experienced once more the sweetness and love from my family and friends, so we do have a place called home. A place that, when all the things in our life go to shit, there are people who we can always rely on, no matter what. Maybe it is time to take a step back, for Francesco to spend time with family and friends at the foot of the mystical Vesuvius Volcano where he is from. Who knows…
Lessons learned?
Also, what are the lessons that I, as listener, or perhaps you as a reader, will take from this story? What is life trying to teach Francesco here? What is the meaning of My Love, My Life? What does a getting a baby or child represent for Francesco? How do you think this story will unfold itself in the next weeks?
Exploring Asia
I’m very grateful for meeting Francesco and how he shared his story and wisdom. He spent many years in Asia and also in South America. So he also highly recommended me to travel to Thailand, Cambodia and also India. Those countries are very open minded and spiritual places in this part of the world. India, with its diversity, is where many (spiritual) religions got founded. He also learnt me how strong (read: emancipated) the Vietnamese women are in running businesses, households and resisting to surrender if needed (during wars). Looking forward to check out the Vietnamese Women’s Museum!
All the knowledge and stories shared on this evening left me exciting to explore more of Asia and hearing more stories from other travellers. With billions of people on the earth and thousands of travellers to meet, there will be more great stories to cover.
On we go!